So much to do, so little time to do it...  Here I am fighting with myself again.  Not knowing where to start.  I've got so much to do and a whole lot to worry about and all I can do is pretty much sit my ass down contemplating on where to start.  I don't know what's going on with myself.  I lost my motivation.  It's so depressing... 

  

THE REUNION WITH HIS FATHER....

Swallowing my pride is a very difficult thing for me to do....
I didn't do it cause I pity you or saw tears in your eyes,
I did it because I LOVE Izaiah very much..
And I would give up my pride for him!!

My son is getting older, and wiser by the minute.  He is at that age where he constantly ask questions, particulary "Where is Daddy?"  Most of the times I find myself speechless, because I am so afraid of the consequence of telling him the truth.  Last year at court was the last time he saw his son.  I haven't heard or seen him since then.  When Izaiah would ask me where he is? I would tell Izaiah that his "Daddy went away for a short while to a nice hospital.  Because he wasn't feeling well and when he does he will come and see you!"  I think I've made a mistake with telling him, assuring him he will come around when I know in my heart he won't.  Only because he proved so many times

I can hear it now, "Mommy, why?" 

As mother,  I feel terrified.  Have I done something that will hurt Izaiah in the future?  I did what I did to protect him.  My parents are divorce and I have been traumatize in there seperation.  So, that's why I've decide to keep him off the loop of things; one being his girlfriend is so terrified to have me around him.  I can understand though, I was in the position before.  Believe when I say I don't want him back.  I am perfectly happy.

I'm truly concerned with his well being, hoping that the current situation doesn't affect him in the future.  m'I doing the right thing for my son??  Decision and actions I've taken, is it benefiting him?? 

Concerned parent...

 

For those that don't know me well, every year I try to make it a point to donate whatever I can to those that are unfortunate.  I've already donated many new and used toys, clothes and furniture to Izaiah's old school, Leaders of Tomorrow, to Saint Aloysius Church, and VVA (Vietnam of Veterans Association).  Jay and his mom also donated clothes, and books generously to Saint Mary's Church and Pentecostal Salvage.  But I'm not stopping there.  This year I'm encouraging you to join me in a toy drive. I've been given an opportunity to promote a toy drive for Vesta.  Toys that we recieve will be donated to disadvantage children to local charities.  VIP- No line for guest who brings a toy.

 

Saturday, December 17

Christmas Toy Drive

@

VESTA

390 8TH AVE NY, NY 10001

(btwn 29TH - 30TH street)

21+ Proper Attire Please!

NO COVER

OPEN BAR 10pm - 11pm

LADIES: Sexy,Trendy.
GENTLEMAN: *Suits/ Blazer with Jean/Pants/ Slacks.
*Collar Shirts Button down no T-shirts.
*Trendy & Fashionable shoes / sneakers.
Trendy and stylish attire is a must.

Two Levels of music
DJ Roli Rho & Guest DJs
Hip-Hop,R&B,Classics,Rock,Reggae

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ANNA & MAERSK!!!

I encourage everyone to donate a toy that may no longer of value to you, but can be a great value to another. 

If there is anyone who is expecting or has newborn child, I have more toys and baby stuff barely used that I am more than willing to give away to you at no cost. 

I will also be accepting new blankets and socks seperately for the homeless.  These donations will be forwarded to Saint Aloysius Church.  The following items can be purchased at a dollar store near you.  Every item donated is very much appreciated.  YOU make a world of difference....I hope to see you there...

Thank you...

 

So here I am at home, alone..

Trying so hard to put one foot out the door..

I just couldn't...

couldn't see him like that..

I'm so sorry...

 

 

 

I'll try again...

I may have not known you as well as all of them did... but I'm so lucky to have spent a moment  with you..  I can't believe how a simple conversation can make me feel at ease and welcome in your home.  Thank you for giving us great memories to remember you by.. I'm truly lucky, because you were definitely one great guy.  We miss you!  You'll always be in our heart..  May you rest in peace..

R.I.P Tito Danny....

 

I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don’t let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

Remember the good times that we had?
I let them slip away from us when things got bad
How clearly I first saw you smilin’ in the sun
Wanna feel your warmth upon me, I wanna be the one<br>

I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don’t let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

I’m so tired but I can’t sleep
Standin’ on the edge of something much too deep
It’s funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word
We are screaming inside, but we can’t be heard

But I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don’t let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

I’m so afraid to love you, but more afraid to loose
Clinging to a past that doesn’t let me choose
Once there was a darkness, deep and endless night
You gave me everything you had, oh you gave me light

And I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don’t let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

 

WERE ALL HERE FOR YOU JOE....

 

There are things and people that once in a while resurface to remind you of exactly what you can be thankful for...

For that... "Thank you.."

the love of my life....

 

EDITED:  8:04 PM  EDITED AGAIN:  11:52pm (sorry Liz)

For the past three months it has been an in and out routine for me at the doctor's office.  My birthday was on the 20th this past Thursday and I was unfortunate enough to spend it at the doctor's office.  I wasn't bummed out about it because the day before Jay's mom treated me to a Manicure and Paraffin Pedicure.  It was definitely relaxing!  Of course, I also had the Spa Treatment to look forward too. 

Yesterday, Rad, Tai, Larry and I went to Long Island at Houston's for dinner since he offered to treat me out for my birthday.  Little did I know it was Tai's birthday on the 22nd.  It was so sweet of him to order a warm apple pie and brownies which had a topping of vanila ice cream drizzled with caramel and chocolate syrup that had a birthday candle for me and Tai.  Rad thank you so much.  Dinner was excellent and the planning was perfect.  Lucky for you, I wore my contacts that made it harder to see from a distance, so the birthday candles was surprising.  "I'm going to the bathroom and comes back in 5 seconds."  lol...

Saturday...  I had my Spa Treatment from Amy, Sue, Dan, Jerry, Jenn, Liz, Anita, Sammy, Lee, Joe and Manny.  It was amazing.  Thank you so much!  I look forward to the next trip to the Spa. 

I would never have thought in a million years I would come home to my very own "Surprise Birthday Party!" No words can express how grateful I am!!! 

THANKS A MILLION to Donald for the Poloroid camera! to Louis for not ruinning the Surprise!!!  Jack & Sammy for the beef steak and the baked ziti Jackie & Christina for the countless dishes, Josh, Manny & Jimmy for the delicious Lasagna, Jerry for the baked chicken, Jenn & Liz for the fruit salad, TJ for the fried rice, Lee for the greatest banana cheesecake, Tita Cora, "mama" for fruit plate, Babe for Ice cream cake and to everyone who helped and prepared a big feast for everyone. 

Thank you to everyone who came, and contributed.  Dan thank you!  I'm sorry you weren't feeling well.  You were very much missed!  If you ever have enough strength to drive out and hopefully end up our way, please feel free to pick up some food.    

If I missed to mention anyone I apologize.  Please know that this day has been the most memorable event ever.  For I have realize and learn so much, that I am forever thankful. 

I've always been an analytical person and from what I have discovered and learned this past year is about Commitment & Friendship.  You know that saying, "Some people come into our lives, some quickly go and some stay and leave a footprint in our hearts and we are never ever the same again." 

I've become a witness to a group called "4k" meaning "4 Korners"  I never really understood the significant meaning until someone asked me why I broke down in tears when I went to the kitchen to see what everyone had prepared.  I can only imagine what it was like for everyone to be running around cooking and cleaning.  I couldn't believe how an outsider like me could ever be so deserving when I have only known this people for a year and a half.  When everyone else knew each other since middle school or high school.  The value of their friendship is what binded them till this day.  A simple phone call and everyone is there, no matter of the location and for whatever occassion.  In one word that signifies support.  Everyone contributes, no if's, and's, or but's about how much it may cost just as long as everyone has fun. "We'll do whatever needs to be done, we'll bring whatever is needed."   To me that means commitment.  And those two words, support & commitment is what holds up the "4 korners" together. 

A dot signifies the distance of ones location (queens, bronx, a few blocks away).  A line signifies everyone reuniting.  A formation takes place, A square or rectangle.  Inside that square or rectangle you will find your true friends in the center whom you can't really escape from ... And why would you want to??

 

To All of YOU,

It has been my greatest pleasure of getting to know each and everyone of you.  Your individuality from Anita's sophistication, Christina's cooking, Jerry's singing, Amy's constant lecturing, Donald's endless party planning, or Joe's story telling are just a few things I think are special... I can definitely go on and on about everyone of you... But to cut a long story short I've been amazed at how considerate and loyal you are to one another.  I found all of you to be the ones who have "stayed and left a footprint in my heart, that I don't think I'll ever be the same again".

 

A Simple Dedication to All of YOU....

 

~ FRIENDS `

As we walk our path of life,

We meet people everyday.

Most are simply met by chance. 

But, some are sent our way.

These become special friends

whose bond we can't explain;

The ones who understand us

and share our joy and pain.

Their love contains no boundaries.

So, even we are apart.

Their presence enhances us

with a warmth felt in the heart.

This love becomes a passageway,

when even the miles disappear.

And so, these friends, God send our way,

Remain forever near.

 

Last but not the least, Jay Thank you for loving me the way you do...  I wouldn't have asked for a better boyfriend... I know it was chaos for you here in the house.  Thank you for washing the dishes and keeping things in order. 

Love,

Genevieve

 

Dedication to my one and only! Happy Birthday babe! I love you...

 

HOW DID YOU KNOW

by Aiza Seguerra

I remember so well
The day that you came into my life
You asked for my name
You had the most beautiful smile

My life started to change
I'd wake up each day feeling alright
With you right by my side
Makes me feel things will work out just fine
CHORUS

How did you know
I needed someone like you in my life
That there's an empty space in my heart
You came at the right time in my life

I'll never forget
How you brought the sun to shine in my life
And took all the worries and fears that I had
I guess what I'm really trying to say
It's not everyday that someone like you comes my way
No words can express how much I love you

Repeat Chorus

 

I hope everyone had as much fun as we did.  Happy Birthday to Lee, Jackie, Jack, Manny, Rad and Jimmy- (sorry we missed you!)